Behind the Session - The First Initiation Private Retreat
Planning the retreat
Earlier this summer, after dealing with some scheduling and weather-related obstacles, the timing finally aligned to host the first Initiation Private Retreat.
I've been working hard for months to prepare the land and the barn for this event, and as the retreat date grew closer, I felt a deep sense of calm and pride in how everything was coming together. It has taken so much work to get here, and seeing the vision I had in my mind become a reality has been the most rewarding experience. Every time I paused to envision the day, I felt the best butterflies in my stomach.
I've got to be honest, friend. It's one thing to dream something up and envision it in your mind. It's another thing to bring the vision to life within a few short months. When I say this project has been a labor of love every step of the way, I truly mean it.
With this being our first Spring and Summer on the property, it's been a learning process to understand the land and its potential while managing and maintaining over 5 acres. I can't tell you how many hours have been logged mowing, edging, hedge-trimming, chainsawing, brush-burning, weed-pulling, trash-collecting....the list of tasks feels endless. But with ounce of blood, sweat and tears poured into it, I fall more in love with this land. Every day it feels more like our own little paradise. Which makes me even more eager for you to be here and experience it.
Preparing the barn for the retreat was also a massive feat. It was previously a working barn, so many hours were spent cleaning and transforming it into a serene, welcoming space. When everything finally came together, I was overwhelmed with happiness – "It's happening."
Ash and I had our brainstorming call a few weeks ahead of the retreat and dialed in the vision and intention for her Initiation.
It was essential for me to tailor the day specifically for her, and her openness and vulnerability laid the foundation for us to create a day that would support her perfectly in this season of her life.
Following our call, I focused on developing the menu and creating a custom embodied movement ceremony for the retreat day.
Food has always been one of my love languages. I adore cooking. I treasure the energy and atmosphere that being in a kitchen generates. I love preparing a meal for my loved ones and pouring my love and intention into every part of it. It felt vital for me to include sacred, intentional nourishment as part of your retreat experience. Not only do I want you to feel fully nourished and held (and I know for me, I don't feel nourished and held unless I'm fed 😂), but I wanted to share this part of myself with you and support you this way, too. I intended to create a menu that felt grounding, and heart-opening without things feeling too dense and heavy or requiring too much prep on my part.
All that said, I also recognized that 'doing it all' for these retreat experiences would require careful planning and structure to avoid burnout. Luckily, I was able to draw inspiration from years of capturing retreats and I was able to quickly refine the menu and create an itemized grocery list.
With the menu in place, I turned my attention to planning the movement ceremony. Ash emphasized the energy of heart-opening during our conversations, so I centered the theme of the movement journey around personal power, leadership, and the ability to open your heart in different phases of life.
One of my favorite things is to craft and build movement journeys, and it was a fun challenge to create something for someone new to this kind of somatic work.
For each movement journey, I focus on setting the intention to start, then I draft a loose outline. Next, I create the playlist and once that's complete, I finalize a simple ceremony outline. Before sharing or teaching a movement practice, it's crucial for me to experience it myself. It's important to me to experience how it feels in the body, not just how it lives on paper or in my mind. After taking myself through the movement journey, I was filled with emotion and couldn't wait for Ash to experience it.
With the menu and movement ceremony officially planned, it was now a matter of finalizing a few last-minute details and waiting for retreat day to arrive.
The day before the retreat, I spent time in and out of the kitchen, prepping the menu for the next day. I added a few small finishing touches to the barn and ceremony space. I put out fresh flowers and made hibiscus mint iced tea. I held a ceremony and movement practice to honor myself and all the steps it took to bring this dream to life.
And then, like a little kid on Christmas Eve, I went to bed giddy with butterflies in my stomach.
Retreat Day
The day of Ash's Initiation Private Retreat was so holy and special. The entire day felt so full of ease and purpose and I'm still beyond blown away by the magick that unfolded.
Ash arrived, I gave her a tour of the property and we chatted for a bit before our opening ceremony. We walked upstairs into a dimly lit ceremony space in the barn loft. The space was adorned with string lights, flickering candles, a large quartz crystal from our property, sacred trinkets from my travels, oracle cards, and delicious rose cacao. Our opening ceremony instantly landed us in the most magickal energy and even now I could cry thinking of how powerful it was.
The day flowed effortlessly from there - next I led her through a movement ceremony in the meadow, I guided her through a journey that was gentle and purposeful, creating space to feel the polarity of a shielded heart and a completely unguarded heart. We went toward her edges a bit, then found softness and steadiness. We spent an hour there, with Ash moving in the Summer heat, dancing through dappled sunlight. Finally, I guided her to a place where she could fully land in her power and own it, without fear. We finished with a guided meditation under the shade of the pine trees followed by lunch at the picnic table, surrounded by the songs of the birds.
Part of Ash's creative intention for her Initiation Retreat was a water moment. If you've seen any of my work, especially the Initiation Ceremony, you know that the water element is a fixture in my sessions for a reason. With no water on our property, it was time to take a field trip. We hopped in my car for a short 15-minute drive to a nearby trail and as soon as we arrived, Ash told me this was exactly what she had in mind.
We spent nearly two hours playing and creating in the water and I am still amazed at what we created together. The moments when we can let our walls down and fully drop into the creative, playful energy within us forever become core memories for me. Watching Ash move and play in the water and breath-by-breath seeing the tension and hesitation melt away to see her fully unfold and take up space in her essence - it's what teenage Monica spent years dreaming of when I tried to picture my dream job.
Once we felt complete in the water, we returned to the property for a light dinner and a chance to chat and drop in with each other as humans. As the light started to turn golden and the sun moved behind the trees, we spent a bit more time on the land capturing photos and videos. We mixed in some brand imagery for Ash (a bit of practicality never hurts!) and ended the evening with a cup of rose moon milk and our sacred closing ceremony.
The entire day is something I will never forget, but the quiet moments of the closing ceremony are something I will come back to again and again throughout my lifetime. Standing side-by-side with Ash, staring into the fire as we watched the flames climb higher, we both had tears in our eyes. There are no words to express the depth of gratitude and honor within me to hold this space and bring this dream to life. And wow, I cannot wait to share it with you too, friend.
Post Retreat
Hearing Ash express to me her profound gratitude for being held, nourished, and seen for an entire day is exactly why the Initiation Retreat exists. In her own words:
"MONICA!!!!
These are gorgeous. Thank you a million times over.
I will have these when I'm old and gray and be so grateful.
Thank you for your artistic collaboration and for holding the space for me to land. This was such a special experience - a true gift, one that I needed more than I even knew!
Thank you, thank you, thank you :) "
Isn't that the most beautiful reflection? 🥲 She named every reason my soul needed to bring this experience to life. Because I know how deeply you deserve a day to be held, celebrated, and honored.
I was nervous that after the first Initiation Retreat, I would feel drained or overwhelmed, but the truth is that I never felt more full, fulfilled, and in my purpose. Of course, it wasn't all rainbows and sunshine, and bringing this to life wasn't without trials, but it was worth every step that it took to get here to be able to share this magick with you.
